Washington D.C. Teenagers Ecstatic They Can Still Hang Out At The Mall

WASHINGTON – It wasn’t just Democrats reveling a shocking upset victory last night, as Democrat Doug Jones defeated Republican Roy Moore to become Alabama’s next Senator. Teenagers across Washington, D.C. […]

Magical Curse Forbids Republican Politicians From Endorsing Democrats

BIRMINGHAM – Scientists and religious experts today discovered a magical curse that appears to prevent Republican politicians from endorsing Democrats in American elections. “This was an extraordinary discovery of deductive […]

Doug Jones Campaign Brimming with Confidence After Eighth White Voter Pledges Support

BIRMINGHAM – The Senate Campaign of Democrat Doug Jones received a much-needed boost in Alabama today as Jim, an insurance agent in Birmingham, became the eighth white voter in the […]

ANALYSIS: Senate Write-In Campaign Impossible Because Alabama Can’t Read

Republicans are in a bind in Alabama. Republican Senatorial efforts to derail the candidacy of Roy Moore in the Alabama Special Senate election have been unsuccessful. Judge Moore, battling claims […]

Republicans Unable to Decide Between Tax Cuts for Millionaires, Basic Integrity

WASHINGTON – As Republican Judge Roy Moore plows on through accusations of molesting teenage girls in the Alabama special Senate Election, Republicans nationally are flummoxed. Republicans are weighing their options […]